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Blog by Morgan Painter

Thoughts on Friends Pt.1

February 26, 2018 | Astrology, Chicago, Dating, Growing up, Mental Health, Nannying, Writing

Scorpio date on Friday was fun, but it’s going to be a no-go. I was not feeling him. While I was trying to cope with my discomfort, I made friends. Little background– we went to an arcade bar, (it was super cool) but the guy was trying to use quarters instead of tokens; so, nothing was working, and I was swimming in a sea of awkward. I know, in the grand scheme of things, it’s whatever, but I was already feeling a touch un-comfy and then the added token debacle had me wanting to run.

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Anyway, we found a pool table that didn’t require payment, and started playing. I’ve played pool before, but my goal is really just to make contact with the ball. When I started breaking rules that I didn’t know existed, I deciphered that Dude was pretty into the game. We played a couple rounds and then the place started to fill up. People started asking to play us for the table, and I was like thank God– this will end soon because I’m awful. However, what happened was, for every one ball I successfully sunk, this guy would sink the rest in one turn. We won pool games at that table for the next four hours. Literally. Lots of people watching while they waited for the table. Lot’s of people watching me act a fool. It was rough. But, if I pretended those people didn’t exist, I enjoyed learning the game.

So, the first couple who challenged us– I enjoyed. They looked to be about my age, the girl was a little better than I was, but we had fun joking about our lack of skill. The guys enjoyed using us as handicaps as they were pretty well matched. Later in the night, I found out that this girl is also a nanny, which was fun. Nannies our age whose first language is English are pretty hard to find. Whenever we find one another, we start swapping stories.

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All of this to say, my takeaway from the evening was that I enjoy making friends. When I was younger, my parents would always tell me that I was good at finding friends. As I grew, I found myself in my head too often to make them. When I switched high schools in tenth grade, I had the benefit of friends from dance as a crutch. When I went to college, I was crutch-less and had to tap into my childhood skill. I did alright, but this is also when I was diagnosed with depression, and I don’t think that’s a coincidence. I’ll continue my adventures with and thoughts on friendship later in the week. Can’t have you all skimming when I get to the good stuff. Stay tuned, and happy Monday!

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-M

Ps. I haven’t written about him in a minute, but can you recall my mentioning an Aquarius who I went out with a few times? Remember I wasn’t sure about him, and wasn’t able to get a clear read? So, I gave him the benefit of the doubt a few times, and started to explain his indecipherable actions with plain stupidity. Truly, it seemed like the only reasonable explanation for his off-ness. Well, I saw him on Saturday, and it seems that it wasn’t a lack of intelligence at all– it was classic dude sketchiness. This is why I always assume asshole until proven otherwise. Seems I almost allowed myself to forget my rule– shame on me. I’m thankful for the reminder, and if you notice me slipping, remind me. Thanks in advance.

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I'm Morgan, a 26 year old searching for her place in the world and writing about the journey.
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